8:76) Katherine Blanke (KAT) 20-JAN-98 17:07

tears i have been trying to hold back all day flow freely down my cheeks now, hopelessly devouring my calm appearance. nothing goes right, no matter th hope, the planning, the desire to do something right for a change and then i stop for a moment. why am i so afraid? day of new classes, confrontations, work and coming home to realize no one cares and i am alone in this fight for who i am. why are the simplest things the hardest to accomplish? i try to do it my way and you come home and tell me i'm just wasting my time. how many times have i longed to pack up what i need and leave, hitching to another place, only to drown the thought in a corner of mind out of fear of anger and resentment because i did what i wanted. why is frustration so hard to overcome? why can't i make myself understand?

why do i cry so hard?

@!KAT